Q: I am in my 40s and have an intense fear of driving. (I have no fear of being a passenger.) I have never held a driver’s license and drove only a couple of times with a learner’s permit, more than 20 years ago. Part of my problem stems from difficulty interpreting spatially what I see in a mirror, even if I am not driving. But I am also terrified of having to make judgments and decisions about other cars, the road, signs, etc. at 55 mph (or even 5 mph!)I have been willing to live within my limitations, but now a romantic relationship is in jeopardy (for valid reasons I won’t go into to preserve my privacy). I am beyond frightened but am willing to try rather than lose the man I love. Is my phobia (and mirror problem) something that I can overcome by myself with a regular driving instructor, or should I seek therapy? I know that cognitive behavior therapy is probably what I need but wonder if I need someone specifically familiar with driving phobias. I am not rich but am willing to go elsewhere in the country (USA) to attempt find effective treatment. How do I find the right therapist?
– Kim O
A: You need a good driving instructor, rather than psychological treatment. In your situation, I would regard cognitive-behavioral treatment as an adjunct to what you really need–a lot of time in the car. The mirror phenomenon is present in everyone (in the car at least.) The mirrors usually have writing on them saying that distances and sizes cannot be judged initially in the mirror–except with experience. The kinds of things you are saying about yourself are typical for people who have not yet learned how to drive. You can definitely learn how to drive despite these perceptual difficulties. You have put it off too long. Now you will have to be patient with yourself. Keep in mind that panic attacks are not a contraindication to driving. In our clinic, where we have seen about 4000 patients with driving phobias, we have never seen anyone have an accident in the middle of a panic attack.
If there is some urgency to getting over this problem, take a lesson every day.
– Dr Neuman